


I Can't Remember

by LexarKlexa



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, Minor Hizzie, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-08-14 01:37:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20184103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexarKlexa/pseuds/LexarKlexa
Summary: The day of the Merge is here and Josie, trying to be at peace with her destiny, struggles to remember the only moment that would allow her to die peacefully.





	I Can't Remember

**Author's Note:**

> So this is literally my first fic ever, constructive criticism is always welcome! I'm not sure if I'll write again, but this inspiration came to me as I was re-watching grey's anatomy season 2 and I just thought how cute it would be to create that iconic post-bombing mer/der moment with posie so! 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

It’s still dark out but Josie Saltzman has been awake for hours. She knows what today is, and that’s what’s kept her up and anxious throughout the night. “_The merge._” Josie whispers as she lets out a deep breath that she didn’t realize she was holding.

She has two options: she can lay in bed all day and just let whatever happens, _happen_; or she can allow herself to watch the sunset one last time and take it all in, doing her best to remember the moments she’s had in her 22 years of life. Even though some of them weren’t all that great, she wants to remember it all. Josie gets up, looks in the mirror, and wants desperately to remember.

While getting dressed, Josie has to wonder: what do you wear on the day you’re going to die? She’s never been one to be flashy unlike Lizzie, she’s also never been one to be completely dull either. She pulls out one of her favorite articles of clothing, that even after all these years she just couldn’t let go. Taking one last look at herself, satisfied with herself, Josie makes her way through the halls of Salvatore one last time.

It’s still pretty early seeing as the sun hasn’t come up yet, thankfully everyone is still asleep leaving Josie alone to the quiet halls. As she passes room by room, she remembers distinctly the time she burned down Hope Mikaelsons’ room to the time Penelope Park quite literally _crushed_ her heart in this very wing of the school.

_Penelope._

The only person she ever fell in love with. The one who left claiming that one day she’d “understand why she did, _everything_ that she did,” although Josie realized a couple years later what Penelope truly meant by that. Josie also had been fueled with anger during those years, so angry that Penelope could just up and leave her without even _fighting _for her.

But then on her 18th birthday it clicked, Penelope couldn’t stand by and watch Josie give up. Which Josie guesses is what she’s doing today anyway, but the idea of killing your own sister isn’t something she could live with.

Josie being too lost in her thoughts suddenly realized where her legs had led her, the rooftop of the Salvatore School. She stumbled upon this spot one night during sophomore year, the same night she met Penelope.

She had just gotten into a fight with Lizzie and needed somewhere to cool down, somewhere Lizzie wouldn’t check. That night is when it all changed. The way Penelope was so effortlessly cool and the way she was smirking at her, although Josie is still unsure if Penelope was just _that_ high or into her from how she was also eyeing her.

Josie likes to come up here from time to time and just breathe. It’s been _her_ spot since then, only shared with Penelope when she was still here. Laying down on the small set-up she had going on with blankets and pillows, Josie closed her eyes and tried desperately to remember the only moment she can’t and slowly started to drift into sleep.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

“Josie! Wake up, it’s Lizzie!” Hope jolts Josie awake.

“What? What is it Hope?” Josie acclimating to being awoken, not realizing she had fallen asleep.

“Sh-she turned, she somehow got ahold of samples of my blood in the lab and-“

“Wait a minute, Lizzie turned? How could you let her do something so reckless?!” Josie exclaimed. “You’re her girlfriend, how could you even let her out of your sight on a day like today?”

“She slipped away before I even had the chance to stop her Josie, this is _not_ my fault.” Hope says, almost pleading with Josie at this point.

Josie sighs. She should have known that Lizzie would do something so rash without even thinking of the consequences.

“You’re right. It’s no one’s fault. What happens now though, with the merge and all?”

“Well now that she’s a heretic, the merge can’t and won’t occur,” Hope says.

Josie can’t think. Not when there’s too much on her mind. What’s going to happen with Lizzie now that she’s a heretic? Where does that leave Josie? She honestly didn’t have any future plans, she didn’t think she _had_ a future worth planning out.

“I have to go.” Josie says while brushing past Hope.

Hope watches her walk away, also at a loss of what to do now.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Josie approaches Lizzie’s door, ever since Penelope left they had stopped sharing rooms in an attempt to give each other space to grow (mainly for Josie’s sanity). She stands there for a brief moment, not even knowing what she’s going to say when she sees Lizzie. There’s only so many things Josie can avoid but Lizzie isn’t one of them.

Just as she’s about to knock on the door, it swiftly opens and there Lizzie is. Looking all the more confident and powerful if that was even possible.

They stand there for a second, neither not really knowing what to say. Lizzie is the first to speak up.

“Jo,” Lizzie frowns, “there was no other way.” And that right there is how Josie found herself breaking down in the arms of her twin sister. “I’m sorry Josie, I am.” Lizzie continues to comfort Josie in the only way she knows how, through what Josie taught her all these years.

“You have spent all these years putting me first and I was selfish. I thought maybe, I would do something selfless for _you_ for a change.”

Josie looks up at Lizzie, her eyes slightly widen but her face relaxes as she understands. Josie realizes that what’s done is done and can’t be reversed, and Lizzie really did it to _save_ Josie.

Clearing her throat, Josie speaks “I get it, Liz. Thank you.” Josie still has tears in her eyes, she just can’t believe Lizzie would actually become a heretic for Josie.

They stay like that for a few more moments until Hope knocks on the door and enters, looking like the perfect mix of relief and upset. Josie knows that look and decides that it was best she leave the room to give them some space.

Giving Lizzie one last hug, “Thank you Liz,” Josie whispers. Lizzie tightens her arms around Josie returning the embrace, “Love you, twinnie.” Lizzie replies.

Josie begins to leave but not before giving Hope a nod, doing her best to convey “good luck” in the form of her signature resting pouty face.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Making her way back to her room, Josie can’t help but feel different. The air smells sweeter, the sun shining a bit brighter, and she feels her heart racing. The merge is over, and she can finally breathe. She was given a second chance at life, to take what she wants and put herself first for once. Well at least until she gets some rest after the most emotionally exhausting day she’s had in years.

Finally flopping on her bed and getting a moment to catch her breath, Josie can’t help but feel as if something is missing. That’s when she hears a knock on her door, deciding against just letting them think she isn’t here, she tiredly gets up to get it. And when she finally thought she had caught a break, her breath catches in her throat.

“Penelope,” Josie murmurs, clearly stunned by the brunette’s appearance.

“Hey Jojo,” Penelope replies in an almost inaudible volume.

It’s been several years, and Penelope still looks all the same. Lob hair and all. If anything, she looks a bit older, stress and worry lines beginning to take over. Realizing she’s been staring and hasn’t said anything else, Josie clears her throat, “uh, what are you doing here?”

“I was already heading back here, for your birthday of course. I wanted to tell you everything, about where I’ve been since I left. Helping Caroline find a cure-“

“You’ve been with my mom?” Josie interjects.

Penelope looks pensive about sharing this, but she figures this is the last chance she has to tell Josie the truth, Lizzie turning unbeknownst to Penelope in the moment.

“I told you I couldn’t watch what happens to you next, so I’ve done everything I could over the last six years to help her find a cure.” Penelope exclaims. “But I know I’ve come back empty-handed, I just wanted one more chance to see you and I-“

“Lizzie is a heretic.” Josie interrupting once again.

Penelope, who had been looking anywhere other than Josie, has never made eye contact quicker with the woman.

“She what? Does Alaric know about this?” Penelope questioned.

“Uh, well I’m not sure. Hope was the one to tell me and then I confronted her so I’m not sure who she’s all told yet.” Josie explains.

Penelope takes this information in, realizing the implications Lizzie’s actions meant for the merge, meant for _Josie_.

“Turns out she _can _be selfless, huh?” Penelope chuckles dryly.

“Yeah, when she wants to be.” Josie smiles.

“Well, I uh, guess I’ll be getting out of your hair then?” Penelope says with a slight lilt of a question at the end.

Josie still stunned at seeing Penelope after all this time, doesn’t know how else to respond and just stares back at Penelope.

As Penelope makes her way out the door, she’s stopped by Josie exclaiming with hesitance, “I can’t remember.”

This grabs Penelope’s attention; she steps back into the room and looks curiously at Josie.

“I can’t remember our last kiss. Which I realize sounds pathetic and sad and honestly, I don’t even care because all day today, I thought I was going to die.” Josie proclaimed.

“I thought I was going to die, and I couldn’t remember the last time we were together and _happy_. And I want to be able to remember that.” Josie explains.

Penelope stands there, a little puzzled and unsure of what Josie is implying here, but like any other day Penelope Park is going to take her at face value and give her what she wants. Because she would do anything for Josette Saltzman. Still, Penelope briefly just soaks everything that Josie is, from her chocolate orbs to her adorable pout that hardly ever leaves her face.

Penelope’s entire expression turns soft, with a slight smile gracing her face; because let’s be honest, Penelope has never once forgotten that very moment.

“It was a Tuesday morning. You were wearing my sweater, the same navy Salvatore one that you have on now actually,” Penelope chuckles. “It always did fit you perfectly.” She takes a moment to let her eyes drag across the sweater adorning Josie’s torso. “You had just showered, your hair still wet and dripping everywhere. You smelled like some kind of _flower_.” Penelope reminisces. “I was running late for chemistry of magic, because I had that big presentation due remember?” Josie nods, as the pieces start coming back to her. “I worked for hours on end making sure it was perfect, and you had to practically pry me from the library the night before.” Penelope laughs even just thinking about a concerned Josie trying to get Pen out of the library.

“And while _I _was in a panic, trying to get myself together, you took it upon yourself to water my plants. Although I’m positive that you drowned them.” That last comment bringing a genuine laugh from straight Josie’s chest, God Penelope could listen to that laugh for hours on end.

“But right before I ran out the door, the bow nearly falling off of my collar,” Penelope almost whispers the next part out with a small smile, “you came up to me, put your arm around my waist, and you kissed me.”

“Soft. And also gone within a blink of an eye. It was kinda like a habit, like we would do it every day for the rest of our lives.” Penelope sadly smiles. “You went back to drowning my plants and I went to class. That was the last time we kissed.”

And for a moment, they stay like that. Just looking into each other’s eyes, neither saying a word but somehow having a silent conversation of understanding. Like they were finally coming home to one another.

Penelope was the first to move, deciding it was best to just leave it at that. As her body made its way halfway through the door once more, Josie speaks up, “Roses. My hair smelled like roses, from my conditioner.

Penelope smiles and nods her head at Josie, knowing this won’t be the last time they see each other. They have the rest of the time in the world to figure it out. For now, Penelope is just happy that Josie is alive and they finally have what Penelope almost didn’t think was possible: a _chance_. 

**Author's Note:**

> Side note: I also decided to separate my main from my stan account so if you want to follow my twitter you can find me @StanCrepe :)


End file.
